Saturday, December 20, 2008

Oh Woe Is Us

The 2009 Gubenatorial Race is looking to provide the CNMI's citizens with another sizable field of candidate from which to choose. The only question out there now is whether or not any of them will be any good.
saipan, cnmi, rota, tinian, fitial, convict, scam
If it's anything like the 2008 Washington Delegate election, we're in for another snoozer. While we at Yap Central expect more candidates to throw their respective hats into the ring, we've presently only a few names on the ballot.
corruption, jack abramhoff, poor leader
While all of the names submitted are familiar, the bad thing is that all of the names are familiar. So far we've only got five candidates who can be called either washed-up, has-beens, retreads, failures or future losers. You pick which tag you wish to place on them.
benigno fitial, worst governor ever, bad candidate, don't vote for him ever again
Who are they? Allow me to explain them....

Benigno Fitial

The incumbent certainly feels that he has a shot at re-election, but he's got one heck of an uphill climb. The Gubnah has had plenty of obstacles to overcome during his term, and that has played a large part in his abysmal popularity rankings.

The only votes he's going to receive in 2009 will be from his family and the government employees who would stand to lose their job should Fitial lose his seat. I'm not talking about the bush cutters, I'm talking about the incompetent brood that fills some important positions in and around the CNMI.

I'm looking at you Melvin Faisao. A fourth grade education isn't good enough for a cabinet position unless your position is in the kitchen cabinet, pulling out pots and pans to make a drum set. Sorry Mel, but you can't vote twice by raising each one of your hands.

I think that means that the Department of Labor will be getting some new brass as well. Cinta will be out and about while the Howard and Deanne show will be showing on reruns on Capital Hill.

Fitial failed to deliver on his promises, bankrupted our government, robbed Pedro to pay Pablo, wasted our cash by suing the feds and belittled the contract workers (well, that's par for the course for everyone so we'll let him slide on that one).

Sorry, Ben. The next time will likely be your last time. Cheer up, because you'll surely be granted a position with Tan Holdings if you aren't interested in retirement just yet. It's a good thing too because you're part of the reason why there won't be anything left in the CNMI Retirement Fund less than two years from now.

The only thing that Fitial has going for him is that current Lieutenant Governor and soon to be convict Tim Villagomez won't be running with him. Tim once had aims of becoming the governor in 2009. Now all he has to look forward to in the New Year is a wider anus courtesy of the federal penal system.

Up Next: Juan Nekai Babauta

Here's a preview:

This guy was the governor who preceded our current governor and who places second behind the current governor for the worst governor of all-time. I'm not just talking about the CNMI, either. Babauta was so bad that he ran our utilities into the ground before...